07 Apr 2007 03:53:50
steve common
[D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

you like to run alone. to depend on your own way of preparing

you feel like you need all your strength just to get up and do it.

you are sure you need all the stuff lined up if you want to get a hope of
hitting even a minor goal.

how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
causing major conflict?

I need help on this. PLease?


06 Apr 2007 19:18:40
Twittering One
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

Email them your scheudle ahead of time.
Them you will be unavailable for social activites between X date and X
date; but upon completion of race goals, you will back in action as a
social animal, for any who like you enough to desire your company.



06 Apr 2007 19:55:43
Charlie Pendejo
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

steve common wrote:
> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you
> alone and not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last
> days, without causing major conflict?

Um. As nicely as possible? And while pausing for a breath before
opening your mouth, reminding yourself that you're entitled to say
"no, not right now" as a straightforward matter of fact sans anything
like guilt or defensiveness, no major apologies or justifications
needed?

I sometimes struggle with this sort of thing too. It seems like it
works out best when I can stay detached enough to observe, "gee it's
interesting how insensitive to hints, forgetful of what's been
discussed before, this other person is," and focus on conveying what I
gotta say effectively, explicitly, precisely; as if I'm talking to a
self-absorbed and slightly thick child, not a willfully cruel person
trying to fuck me over.

Then again, I don't know your family or loved ones - maybe they
require a different strategy than mine. ;-)

Best of luck, seriously. Do whatever you gotta to stay cool.



06 Apr 2007 19:57:03
Charlie Pendejo
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

Oh, and what's a [D-8] ?



06 Apr 2007 23:08:55
the_bmac
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

steve common wrote:
> you like to run alone. to depend on your own way of preparing
>
> you feel like you need all your strength just to get up and do it.
>
> you are sure you need all the stuff lined up if you want to get a hope of
> hitting even a minor goal.
>
> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
> not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
> causing major conflict?
>
> I need help on this. PLease

Merde, arrêtes ces niaiseries. Tu veux vraiment dire va te faire enculer à ta famille?
We all have the same 24hrs per day. If your training takes X hrs. per day away from them, make sure
you give back exactly that amount of time of yourself _to them_ when you are with them. If the
accounts balance, all is good.


07 Apr 2007 03:12:22
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

steve common <steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote

> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you
> alone and not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last
> days, without causing major conflict?
>
> I need help on this. PLease?

I always thought that was the main reason God invented the pre-race
taper period -- to help runners cope with exactly those kinds of
pressures.


06 Apr 2007 20:12:43
h squared
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

Charlie Pendejo wrote:
> Oh, and what's a [D-8] ?
>


i thought it was a funny "arrggh" face (read sideways, donovan-style),
but maybe for me it's like an inkblot and my translation of [D-8] is
only revealing my own inner "arrggh".

heather,
broken car, broken dog #1, broken dog # 2, haven't run since tuesday..
arggh.
(ps. good luck steve!! :)


07 Apr 2007 03:21:40
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

the_bmac <bm@c.com > wrote

> Merde, arrêtes ces niaiseries. Tu veux vraiment dire va te
> faire enculer à ta famille?

"Shit, stop these sillinesses. You want to really say will make you
fuck up the ass with your family?"

Sincerely, Google Language Tools.


06 Apr 2007 20:24:04
Twittering One
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

> heather,
> broken car, broken dog #1, broken dog # 2, haven't run since tuesday..
> arggh.
> (ps. good luck steve!! :)

2 sick dogs?



06 Apr 2007 23:51:15
the_bmac
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

MarkH wrote:
> the_bmac <bm@c.com> wrote
>
>> Merde, arrêtes ces niaiseries. Tu veux vraiment dire va te
>> faire enculer à ta famille?
>
> "Shit, stop these sillinesses. You want to really say will make you
> fuck up the ass with your family?"
>
> Sincerely, Google Language Tools.

close

Steve posts from France, yes, so he'll get it. But "Google Language Tools" got you close enough not
to be able to understand what it really said i.e., "Shit, stop or enough of this stupidity. You
really want to tell your family to go fuck themselves?. Fuck off doesn't translate literally into
French so they say (fig.)go fuck yourself (lit.) go stick it in your ass. As an epithet I like it
better because it's just so much more vulgar. The Merovingian was right.


07 Apr 2007 03:59:55
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

the_bmac <bm@c.com > wrote

> MarkH wrote:
>> the_bmac <bm@c.com> wrote
>>
>>> Merde, arrêtes ces niaiseries. Tu veux vraiment dire va te
>>> faire enculer à ta famille?
>>
>> "Shit, stop these sillinesses. You want to really say will make
>> you fuck up the ass with your family?"
>>
>> Sincerely, Google Language Tools.
>
> close
>
> Steve posts from France, yes, so he'll get it. But "Google
> Language Tools" got you close enough not to be able to
> understand what it really said i.e.,

Oh, come on, quit spoiling the fun.



07 Apr 2007 09:36:40
Tony S.
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

"steve common" <steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote in message
news:gvtd135po7erpro5jq1gj0qtle9a366jac@4ax.com...
> you like to run alone. to depend on your own way of preparing
>
> you feel like you need all your strength just to get up and do it.
>
> you are sure you need all the stuff lined up if you want to get a hope of
> hitting even a minor goal.
>
> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
> not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
> causing major conflict?
>
> I need help on this. PLease?

Tell them you're ill, it's contagious, and that you're gonna run anyway and
if you do anything but rest beforehand, you're likely to end up in the
hospital afterwards. You know - all that training - most of them think
you're crazy anyway, it's not a stretch for them to believe you're on the
verge of a health crisis for overdoing it. I've used a subtle version of:
"I'm exhausted from all the training and I think I'm fighting off something,
so I have to rest or I won't have any chance of even doing this thing that
I've been training for 6 months for...".

Shit, I just sneezed - damn winter training weather! (Maybe there's some
truth to what I just said ;)

-Tony




07 Apr 2007 07:57:51
Doug Freese
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?


"steve common" <steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote in message
news:gvtd135po7erpro5jq1gj0qtle9a366jac@4ax.com...
> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone
> and
> not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
> causing major conflict?

I sat down with my family and we agreed to a set schedule. For instance
some or all of Saturday was my day for a long run unless something
special came along and then I moved it to Sunday. My part of the
compromise for peace and tranquility was to do my weekday runs early in
the morning while they were sleeping with one night(wed) 6-8 pm for
speed work at the track.

In effect I was taking Saturday and few hours mid-week away from the
wife and family. If I had tried to run at night after work and take
Saturday or Sunday, I would have been in divorce court and rightfully
so. Try to find the source(s) of contention and see what compromises
can happen. I know this assumes rational behavior and people wanting you
to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I also know a few instances where one
of the spouses runs and they other doesn't and every moment of running
time is begrudged even if they were sleeping. I was very lucky - my
family understood although questioned some of my longer races.

-Doug




07 Apr 2007 18:34:20
joe positive
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

On Sat, 07 Apr 2007 03:53:50 +0200, steve common
<steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote:


>how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
>not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
>causing major conflict?

Invent a business trip. Go stay in a hotel for a few days, alone.
Really. They may be pissed off when they learn you've lied to them,
but not as pissed off as they'd be if you told them to fuck off every
time they needed to be told, these last few days.

courage,

Karen



live! vicariously!


08 Apr 2007 09:27:57
Miss Anne Thrope
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

Cream puff, jogging IS a theater show.

You put on a brightly colored costume and prance around in the streets
just hoping that someone, anyone notices you.

Your family already has more than enough reasons to think you're a dick,
without making your jogging schedule an issue.

Lighten up Francis.



09 Apr 2007 16:01:49
Ken
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

In article <gvtd135po7erpro5jq1gj0qtle9a366jac@4ax.com >, steve common
<steven.common@wanadoo.fr > writes
>you like to run alone. to depend on your own way of preparing
>
>you feel like you need all your strength just to get up and do it.
>
>you are sure you need all the stuff lined up if you want to get a hope of
>hitting even a minor goal.
>
>how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
>not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
>causing major conflict?
>
>I need help on this. PLease?


Cursed be the man, the poorest wretch in life,
The crouching vassal to the tyrant wife,
Who does his jogging while she's still in bed,
Who keeps his trainers in the garden shed,
Who cannot race without her high permission
Whose entry fee is coaxed from her possession,
Who must to her, his pre-race schedule tell,
Who fears a curtain lecture worse than hell,
If such a lot had fallen to my part,
I'd break her spirit or I'd break her heart,
I'd charm her with the magic of a switch
I'd emigrate to France to teach the bitch.

--
Ken


09 Apr 2007 21:06:11
steve common
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

Excellent :'-D

Thanks to all for you ideas on this. I did try the "business trip" but it
was suspected as a standard adultery ploy, so had to can it.

I'll just stop wasting energy and will practice my "droplets on a
lacquered Duck's back" Thi Chi Chuan sequence :-P


09 Apr 2007 19:21:54
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

steve common <steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote

Steve, do you know if the Paris marathon route is marked in miles, or
just in KM?

Also, do you get to use your own bag in the drop-off lockers on
Avenue Foch, or do you have to use an official bag?



09 Apr 2007 21:39:15
steve common
Re: How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

"Charlie Pendejo" <Charlie.Pendejo@gmail.com > wrote:

>Oh, and what's a [D-8] ?

D as in the big D-Day, so D-8 is 8 days before the big day. Like NASAs
"T-xx and counting". Maybe I got (even more) perverted by the french
version "Jour J", J-1, J-2 etc


09 Apr 2007 21:50:10
steve common
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

MarkH <markh@goamil.com > wrote:

>Steve, do you know if the Paris marathon route is marked in miles, or
>just in KM?

I believe it's marked in miles too. It was in 2001 when I first did it.

If you check out the "Google" map on the website, it shows miles as well
as kms.

>Also, do you get to use your own bag in the drop-off lockers on
>Avenue Foch, or do you have to use an official bag?

I used my own bag in 2001 and the site doesn't mention any special bags.
You just have to show your race bib and they write it on a plastic outer
bag or a label (can't remember which).

I expect the information desk at the Marathon Expo, where you go to pick
up bib/chip, will know.


09 Apr 2007 22:16:14
Phil M.
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

markh@goamil.com wrote:

> steve common <steven.common@wanadoo.fr> wrote
>
> Steve, do you know if the Paris marathon route is marked in miles, or
> just in KM?

I must've missed something. Are you doing the Paris Marathon? I thought you
decided against it.

--
Phil M.


11 Apr 2007 00:25:24
anders
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?


steve common kirjoitti:


> how do you tell family and loved ones to FUCK OFF and leave you alone and
> not have you to do theater shows and stuff in the last days, without
> causing major conflict?

The main rule is: pre-empt! Arrange, book et cetera all sorts of
exciting (or unexciting) and timeconsuming outings for family et
cetera for the days and weeks *after* your big event. The promise (or
threat) of rich cultural activity, a busy social schedule and all-
around "quality time" unspoiled by the constrains of your (normal)
running life should do the trick of making the family et cetera leave
you alone to the desired degree.

(This advice comes too late and the weather wouldn't appear to be
ideal on the day - but good luck anyway...)


Anders



11 Apr 2007 12:38:50
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

"Phil M." <pmarg@charter.net > wrote

> markh@goamil.com wrote:
>
>> steve common <steven.common@wanadoo.fr> wrote
>>
>> Steve, do you know if the Paris marathon route is marked in
>> miles, or just in KM?
>
> I must've missed something. Are you doing the Paris Marathon? I
> thought you decided against it.

Looks like I'll be making the decision on 1 PM Thursday. That's
when I leave for the airport. As of this morning, it doesn't look
too good. Over the last couple of days, the temperature forecast
has been rapidly escalating -- it's now up to 77F. Even though
I'm not looking for a PR, with the late start at 8:45 AM, I'd be
running in temperatures similar to those you suffered through in
Atlanta. Unless I come up with a truly compelling reason to go,
can't see flying that far just to be miserable.



11 Apr 2007 15:55:22
steve common
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

MarkH <markh@goamil.com > wrote:

>Over the last couple of days, the temperature forecast
>has been rapidly escalating -- it's now up to 77F.

It is indeed looking crappy for temperatures; 52-79°F latest forecast.


11 Apr 2007 16:03:05
steve common
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

"anders" <hop.allez@suomi24.fi > wrote:

>The main rule is: pre-empt! Arrange, book et cetera all sorts of
>exciting (or unexciting) and timeconsuming outings for family et
>cetera for the days and weeks *after* your big event.

The main rule is never sign up for anything while drunk :-/

If I'd decided to do Albi again, the week-end after, it would've cost 10th
of the price and 100th of the hassle, and it wouldn't have been much
hotter weather than we're expecting for Paris.

Oh well. We'll see how quick I can drag bib 1618 round the town :-)


11 Apr 2007 22:31:00
MarkH
Re: [D-8] How to tell friends and familly to"back" off?

steve common <steven.common@wanadoo.fr > wrote

> "anders" <hop.allez@suomi24.fi> wrote:
>
>>The main rule is: pre-empt! Arrange, book et cetera all sorts of
>>exciting (or unexciting) and timeconsuming outings for family et
>>cetera for the days and weeks *after* your big event.
>
> The main rule is never sign up for anything while drunk :-/

And the only remedy is to continue drinking right through the event.
Anticipating the predicted 79F, I've already started. I'm hoping
that Medoc station on the course is not just a myth, I should be just
about sobering up by the time I reach it.