25 May 2004 06:19:18
M. Krafick
My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

I had "Paintball Magazine" and "Splat" laying on the table while my
wife and I are eating dinner. Had been reading them while waiting for
the car to be fixed and plopped them on the table when I got home. My
wife and I are eating dinner and she notices the magazines.

Mind you, she is going to play for her first time with me when my damn
ankle heals. So she is half paying attention to this stuff and starts
flipping through the magazines while I explain some things to her.

Splat magazine is much more, how do I say, Testosterone filled (as
opposed to paintball magazine). Half way through the magazine we start
running across models wearing bikini's, hotpants, and tank tops - all
smiling at the camera while holding a PB gun.

She laughs and says "So are these the outfits I am supposed to wear to
the field". I answer sure hun, "While all the guys stare, I'll shoot
them".

... Later on that evening she comes out in her "summer PJ's" which are
fairly skimpy. "Like my new paintball outfit"? We laugh.

.. The next day, I ask if we have any mail - she said, "Not really but
we have a magazine you may want". Then tosses me a Victoria's Secret
magazine and says "Bunch of new paintball outfits for me to choose
from" with a laugh.

I think we discovered a new codeword for "Wanna go upstairs *wink*".
Its now "Wanna go play paintball".

OH, BTW - What the hell is a asshat?


25 May 2004 15:17:43
Volt
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

"M. Krafick" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> I had "Paintball Magazine" and "Splat" laying on the table while my
> wife and I are eating dinner. Had been reading them while waiting for
> the car to be fixed and plopped them on the table when I got home. My
> wife and I are eating dinner and she notices the magazines.
>
> Mind you, she is going to play for her first time with me when my damn
> ankle heals. So she is half paying attention to this stuff and starts
> flipping through the magazines while I explain some things to her.
>
> Splat magazine is much more, how do I say, Testosterone filled (as
> opposed to paintball magazine). Half way through the magazine we start
> running across models wearing bikini's, hotpants, and tank tops - all
> smiling at the camera while holding a PB gun.
>
> She laughs and says "So are these the outfits I am supposed to wear to
> the field". I answer sure hun, "While all the guys stare, I'll shoot
> them".
>
> ... Later on that evening she comes out in her "summer PJ's" which are
> fairly skimpy. "Like my new paintball outfit"? We laugh.
>
> .. The next day, I ask if we have any mail - she said, "Not really but
> we have a magazine you may want". Then tosses me a Victoria's Secret
> magazine and says "Bunch of new paintball outfits for me to choose
> from" with a laugh.
>
> I think we discovered a new codeword for "Wanna go upstairs *wink*".
> Its now "Wanna go play paintball".
>

Remember to wear a mask. Safety first, ya' know?

> OH, BTW - What the hell is a asshat?

Being the self-proclaimed Keeper of the Asshats I feel I should answer this.
From the renowned site www.turdwords.com

Definition 1: one who has one's head up one's ass.
Definition 2: one who has one's face planted in an upturned ass, making
oneself look like a hat on said ass.
Definition 3: an ignorant person.

I also use it as an imaginary hat that I may give out to regulars here from
time to time. The hats usually reflect the essence of the poster.
--

Volt
www.liquimetal.com
The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein





25 May 2004 15:38:31
Mike The Newbie
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Asshat is my new word of the week. Its almost like Pee-Wee's Word of
teh day where everyone screams when they hear it.

Thank you for clearing that up - may want to consider adding the
definition to the FAQ :)


On Tue, 25 May 2004 15:17:43 GMT, "Volt"
<[email protected] > wrote:

>> OH, BTW - What the hell is a asshat?
>
>Being the self-proclaimed Keeper of the Asshats I feel I should answer this.
>From the renowned site www.turdwords.com
>
>Definition 1: one who has one's head up one's ass.
>Definition 2: one who has one's face planted in an upturned ass, making
>oneself look like a hat on said ass.
>Definition 3: an ignorant person.
>
>I also use it as an imaginary hat that I may give out to regulars here from
>time to time. The hats usually reflect the essence of the poster.
>--
>
>Volt



25 May 2004 19:15:08
Volt
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.


"Mike The Newbie" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> Asshat is my new word of the week. Its almost like Pee-Wee's Word of
> teh day where everyone screams when they hear it.
>

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa there, Chief. Asshat is a
lifestyle, not a hip new buzzword. If you're gonna treat it like that I'll
ban you from it's use altogether. You've been warned.

> Thank you for clearing that up - may want to consider adding the
> definition to the FAQ :)

No. That would take the fun out of it. Besides, the word "asshat" has an
essence all its own that cannot be completely defined or explained. Though
some definitions serve to shed some light on the use of the word "asshat"
its true meaning can never be fully comprehended by the human mind.
--

Volt
www.liquimetal.com
The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein





25 May 2004 20:22:17
Mike The Newbie
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.


Hmm, Would that make Grifter the Dalai Lama of Asshatism? Since he
plays the role of "Reasonable Asshole" around here?

In preparing for this way of life - does it involve shaving my head,
sacrificing chikens, and/or goatsblood? Cause well, I am into that you
know.

I promise to use the word with honor. No more pee wee references.

On Tue, 25 May 2004 19:15:08 GMT, "Volt"
<[email protected] > wrote:

>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa there, Chief. Asshat is a
>lifestyle, not a hip new buzzword. If you're gonna treat it like that I'll
>ban you from it's use altogether. You've been warned.



25 May 2004 21:16:44
Volt
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.


"Mike The Newbie" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
>
> Hmm, Would that make Grifter the Dalai Lama of Asshatism? Since he
> plays the role of "Reasonable Asshole" around here?
>

No. "Asshat" and "asshole" are similar, yet different. Grifter is an
"asshat" as well as an "asshole", but although he functions well as an
"asshole" he could never be an authority on being an "asshat." You have
much to learn young one.

> In preparing for this way of life - does it involve shaving my head,
> sacrificing chikens, and/or goatsblood? Cause well, I am into that you
> know.
>

Shave your head if you feel it will bring you closer to the "asshat source."
There is no condemnation is Asshatism. However, sacrifices are not
permitted. Asshatism respects all life. Again, you have much to learn.

> I promise to use the word with honor. No more pee wee references.
>

Thank you. "Asshat" deserves our reverence.
--

Volt
www.liquimetal.com
The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein





25 May 2004 18:58:19
SvB4EvA
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Wow, I think I'll stop reading this post, too deep for me.

"Volt" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
>
> "Mike The Newbie" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]
> >
> > Hmm, Would that make Grifter the Dalai Lama of Asshatism? Since he
> > plays the role of "Reasonable Asshole" around here?
> >
>
> No. "Asshat" and "asshole" are similar, yet different. Grifter is an
> "asshat" as well as an "asshole", but although he functions well as an
> "asshole" he could never be an authority on being an "asshat." You have
> much to learn young one.
>
> > In preparing for this way of life - does it involve shaving my head,
> > sacrificing chikens, and/or goatsblood? Cause well, I am into that you
> > know.
> >
>
> Shave your head if you feel it will bring you closer to the "asshat
source."
> There is no condemnation is Asshatism. However, sacrifices are not
> permitted. Asshatism respects all life. Again, you have much to learn.
>
> > I promise to use the word with honor. No more pee wee references.
> >
>
> Thank you. "Asshat" deserves our reverence.
> --
>
> Volt
> www.liquimetal.com
> The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
> - Albert Einstein
>
>
>




26 May 2004 01:01:56
Lee Drake
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Asshat originates in MMPORGS (Massively MultiPlayer Online Roleplaying Games
like Dark Asshat Of Camelot and EverCrack) where you couldn't actually SAY
anything to an enemy you just killed (due to the way the game was
constructed there was no way to really "taunt" someone). They would just
lie there, hoping someone would resurrect them, while the most insulting
thing you could do was to sit your toon down on their head - thus an
"Asshat".

It was new way back when - now it's just ho hum :)

Cheers,
Firefly




26 May 2004 01:20:37
Volt
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

> It was new way back when - now it's just ho hum :)
>
> Cheers,
> Firefly

Sacrilege! Sacrilege I say!
--

Volt
www.liquimetal.com
The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein





25 May 2004 23:08:49
Insane Ranter
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Who the hell jumps onto a newsgroup posting about how hot there wife is blah
blah...

Provide pictures or I dupe thee Troll




26 May 2004 03:30:29
Jeff Goslin
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

"Insane Ranter" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> Who the hell jumps onto a newsgroup posting about how hot there wife is
blah
> blah...
>
> Provide pictures or I dupe thee Troll

How exactly are you going to do that? Are you going to trick him into
running over a bridge?

(Since I *KNOW* you're too stupid to know what the hell I'm talking about,
you might want to look up the word "dupe" in the dictionary. I think the
word you seek is "dub".)

--
Jeff Goslin - MCSD - www.goslin.info
It's not a god complex when you're always right





26 May 2004 14:27:53
Mike The Newbie
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Oh God, I am acting likea troll - my apologies.

On Tue, 25 May 2004 23:08:49 -0400, "Insane Ranter" <[email protected] >
wrote:

>Who the hell jumps onto a newsgroup posting about how hot there wife is blah
>blah...
>
>Provide pictures or I dupe thee Troll
>



26 May 2004 14:51:07
Insane Ranter
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.


"Jeff Goslin" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> "Insane Ranter" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]
> > Who the hell jumps onto a newsgroup posting about how hot there wife is
> blah
> > blah...
> >
> > Provide pictures or I dupe thee Troll
>
> How exactly are you going to do that? Are you going to trick him into
> running over a bridge?
>
> (Since I *KNOW* you're too stupid to know what the hell I'm talking about,
> you might want to look up the word "dupe" in the dictionary. I think the
> word you seek is "dub".)

Hug N' Kisses.




26 May 2004 14:51:20
Insane Ranter
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

I just wanted pictues of hot woman

"Mike The Newbie" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> Oh God, I am acting likea troll - my apologies.
>
> On Tue, 25 May 2004 23:08:49 -0400, "Insane Ranter" <[email protected]>
> wrote:
>
> >Who the hell jumps onto a newsgroup posting about how hot there wife is
blah
> >blah...
> >
> >Provide pictures or I dupe thee Troll
> >
>




28 May 2004 16:15:27
Dark Helmet
Re: My wife's skimpy PB outfit.

Heh...

I should be so lucky..

DH


"M. Krafick" <[email protected] > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> I had "Paintball Magazine" and "Splat" laying on the table while my
> wife and I are eating dinner. Had been reading them while waiting for
> the car to be fixed and plopped them on the table when I got home. My
> wife and I are eating dinner and she notices the magazines.
>
> Mind you, she is going to play for her first time with me when my damn
> ankle heals. So she is half paying attention to this stuff and starts
> flipping through the magazines while I explain some things to her.
>
> Splat magazine is much more, how do I say, Testosterone filled (as
> opposed to paintball magazine). Half way through the magazine we start
> running across models wearing bikini's, hotpants, and tank tops - all
> smiling at the camera while holding a PB gun.
>
> She laughs and says "So are these the outfits I am supposed to wear to
> the field". I answer sure hun, "While all the guys stare, I'll shoot
> them".
>
> ... Later on that evening she comes out in her "summer PJ's" which are
> fairly skimpy. "Like my new paintball outfit"? We laugh.
>
> .. The next day, I ask if we have any mail - she said, "Not really but
> we have a magazine you may want". Then tosses me a Victoria's Secret
> magazine and says "Bunch of new paintball outfits for me to choose
> from" with a laugh.
>
> I think we discovered a new codeword for "Wanna go upstairs *wink*".
> Its now "Wanna go play paintball".
>
> OH, BTW - What the hell is a asshat?